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Of course, I speak only in the longing and hypothetical manner of the wanna-be rebel. After all…skipping my exams?! *Gasp*…what would my mother say…

But really, why do we even have these stupid things in high school? (Uni exams, I’m told, are a totally different affair) Why force students at the end of the year to do no more than re-learn everything they’ve already forgotten?

By now, I’m sure even the most out-of-the-loop adult has caught on; teens are a bunch of slackers and idiots. In this lifetime, nothing short of food, money, or material goods will motivate us, least of all the presence of a massive test spanning the entire course looming at the end of every semester. What, is this enough to convince us that, as well as pursuing extra-curriculars, maintaining decent grades in all classes, and maybe keeping up a social life, we’re supposed to keep up a constant routine of reviewing not just new course material, oh no, but all the crapola we’ve learned previously? Ummm…no

Are they supposed to make sure that we’ve actually mastered the concepts taught to us over 5 months? If so, then what is the point of all the regular tests during the actual semester?

Are they either a final check to ensure that the students receive a passing grade only when deserved, or a last-ditch attempt to pull up marks? Either way, it’s a total failure. If you actually take the time to examine the math, 30% isn’t going to do much to any final grade, unless the student is already precariously teetering at the brink of failure (this applies even more strongly for those courses where the 30% is split between the exam and an ISU, therefore causing the exam to be worth only a measly 15%).

Though, administrators of school boards everywhere, if you happen to be reading this, I take into account that the present system is what it “best” for us, I’m sure, and in no way do I present a challenge to effect any changes such as, say, making exams worth half of the final mark, or anything. Just commenting on what seems like futility from my POV…

So, to encapsulate…why? Because honestly, there is precious little worse than going over an entire semester’s worth of Physics, Biology, Calculus and Vectors in less than a week.

Hmm…mayhaps there is a conspiracy afoot? Yes, that’s it! As is plain to all, teenagers are clearly the bane of all existence. So why not get rid of them once and for all? Simply assign them all a task so tedious and arduous that the only result will be the mass head-desking of a large majority, thus resulting in at least half of them dead, or at least rendered brain-dead, and the world will be rid of them forever!

Ah, you see, but this fiendish plot shall not work! Teenagers, now hear this! Screw exams, toss your textbooks up in the air, and go frolic in the wheat fields!

Or, at least, you guys can go do that…I still have some studying to do if I want to avoid death by furious mother…


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